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My Single Valentine

February 14, 2012



14th Feb., 2012…presumably Valentine’s Day…

One fine Valentine’s Day morning, which happened to be a Saturday, I found myself sitting on the sofa and typing out the article below. Reading it now, 3-years later, I still agree and it still applies. I didn’t have a blog at that time so my writings usually ended up in my hard-drive unpublished or on my Facebook page…mostly in my hard-drive though…

So I decided I’d repost this article  (with a few updates) now I have a blog and hope you enjoy reading it!

My Single Valentine…

If I really wanted to be negative, I’d refuse to accept the idea that society has chosen to set aside one day a year for two people to share their love. The realist in me is thinking, shouldn’t it be that two people who truly love each other shouldn’t need a day to proclaim their everlasting lust and desire for one another, should they?

Notice I said lust, not love…I’m not being bitter, I’m just being realistic. Sure, there are a fair share of people who know that what they have is love, but there’s also the majority who so easily confuse love with lust…yeah, I was one of that majority until the proverbial boot came and kicked me right up my tushie…

Being single this Valentine’s Day, I can take pleasure in the fact that I am able to look at the whole thing from a different point of view. It’s just a day that’s slapped in the middle of winter to give people respite from the tiring truth that there’s no public holiday until April which means they have to work tirelessly till then and this day, 14th Feb, gives them an excuse to supposedly relax and spend money on each other…

It’s so commercial, with florists, chocolate shops and Clinton’s bear schemers using it to cash in on a person’s tendency to conform to the pattern of society.

When I was in a relationship and V-day came around, I always thought it was the opportunity to show my man just how much he means to me and more importantly, the opportunity to see how much I actually mean to him…and there lies the problem. Do I actually want to accept a man who is pretty much saying: “I love you….this much!”  with a bunch of flowers, a card and a box of chocolate?? Is that how much his love for me is worth?? Food for thought, ladies and gents.

And then there’s also the slight chance that ladies may jealously compare what their man gave them to what their girlfriend received from her man…!

I hope I don’t sound bitter here because this Valentine’s Day I was single and oh so fierce! And my motivation in thinking that V-day is seriously overrated is (unsurprisingly) linked to my emotional and sensitive side.

Thinking about it, V-day should be an expansion of the special bond that two people share and not an excuse for an excessive display of materialistic affection. My ideal relationship would be one where the bond I share with my other half cannot be defined by the calendar or even stuffed animals from Hamleys…if true love were to exist between myself and another man, well, everyday should feel like Valentine’s Day!

 It isn’t until now that I have taken the opportunity unwittingly placed in my lap to stop and think about whether Valentine’s Day is really important to me. But sitting on the sofa that Saturday, I came to the understanding that loving myself as much as I truly hope to love another is possibly what defines the “joy” of Valentine’s Day for me.

I guess on that note, I can continue enjoying Valentine’s Day…when I feel like it…



Chronicles of a Bionic Woman

I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.

(Images courtesy of Google Images)

  1. Yes, one must love oneself first before venturing further, I reckon 🙂

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